My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
