Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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