she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Randomize
