the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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