Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
