The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
