turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
