You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
