Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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