Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
