I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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