So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Do vagina's smell?
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
