The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
