yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
