i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
