honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
