I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Randomize
