Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(937): View more from Ohio

they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend

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(425): View more from Washington

Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap

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(512): View more from Texas

He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.

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(630): View more from Illinois

everybody makes mistakes

(1-630): View more from Illinois

i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances

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(816): View more from Missouri

I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?

(1-816): View more from Missouri

Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.

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(305): View more from Florida

I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?

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(778): View more from British Columbia

The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.

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(272): View more from

He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!

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