omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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