One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Randomize