You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
