Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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