Screwed.edu
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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