i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Randomize
