I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
How's work?
Spinning.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Randomize
