i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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