Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Randomize
