needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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