Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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