just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I just want nice things and good sex
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Randomize
