Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
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