Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
