The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
