I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i would punch a child for taco bell
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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