I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Randomize
