ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
They left me at home... I'm a liability
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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