I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
