I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Randomize
