a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
