Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
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