tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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