Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I just saw a hot homeless man
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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