Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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