You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Randomize
