I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
