so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Where are you guys?
Drunk
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
