margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
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