tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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