This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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