It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
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