Kiss
Puke
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
